It’s a good idea for children to do age-appropriate chores at home. Kids learn to be self-sufficient and get a confidence boost. Kids who do chores at home have greater self-esteem as adults.
Nowadays, parents are exhausted, and teens are distracted. What if your teen is resistant to doing chores? What if they constantly complain and you are annoyed and overwhelmed? I’ve been there and have two tips that help.
Assign frequent mini-chore lists
First, give your teen a short (two-to-three task) chore list more frequently instead of a longer list say, once a week. Instead of telling them to do the chores NOW and getting annoyed that they don’t hop to immediately (which, let’s face it, they usually don’t), give them the short written list (or send them a text); and tell them that the chores must be done sometime today by, e.g., 6pm.
Tell them that if the chores are not done by that time, then you will hunt them down at said time and make them do them. If they don’t want you to get involved, they need to do the chores before 6.
Teens want to be independent and don’t like to be told what to do. This strategy supports their independence by giving them the chance to get things done on their own, and on their own time, without involving the parents.
Break tasks down into micro-tasks
Second, break tasks down into micro-tasks. For example, we cook frequently in my house, and I involve my teen all the time. My take is that cooking is an essential life skill.
Teens often don’t have the patience to cook a meal from scratch. But they can chop a vegetable or stir a pot while you do something else in the kitchen, or they can read an ingredient list and gather and measure ingredients.
Even if your teen doesn’t have the patience to cook an entire meal with you, you can teach them certain cooking skills by chunking tasks down. If they resist, tell them, “Please do this one thing, it will only take a minute or two, and then you can go.” That usually motivates them to get the task done 🙂 and they may have learned something 🙂
What other tasks do your teens do regularly?
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